Day 96 FIRST HALF

[meilleurekimiko]

* = Known OOCly, but not ICly
More than one * = ...not something important!

Shady Markets Suck:
- Yuuri would bring back groceries to the dorms, but after drinking what looks like Diet Coke she starts acting weird. Nevertheless, she asks about the computer in the lobby. Konata points out (after asking Yuuri how the hell she can stand Diet soda) that its a copy of the Zanzibar Central Computer.
- After another sip, Yuuri really wonders if she's drinking Diet Coke. She goes to the nearest sink and empties the can out - nice beautiful RAINBOW WATER.
- She plans to return the water, but Kira asks if she's OK. After dodging this question for a bit, she confirms that she may want to see the infirmary and its a good idea to clean the fridge out.
- With that after talking with Konata and Setsuna, she leaves as Al mentions on the system that it's a good idea to clean the fridge out. This forces Mina to come down as Ihme points out the fridge. So, they plan to clean the thing out*
- Amund reminds everyone in the lobby of the importance of seizing the ex-Principal's assets, but they are all interrupted by "Prestissimo".
- The manifestation proves to be a hell of a pest, even after taking a golf ball to the mouth to get rid of the Chidori disguise, and shrugging off a Bakunetsu God Finger from Konata; yet all it takes to force a retreat is get poked by Mina's Firefly. Even though the manifestation grabs the place, just the fact the manifestation bled forced it to explode (defeat count left: 1).
- Charitee would show up as Amund calls up Rai as Tourne is up to her usual antics.
- They discuss the "triangle" as Ihme uses a plunger to fling Tourne out of the dorm plumbing.
- Now that the students know the Chinatown Express Market has the faggot water, Konata comments on the fact they know where it all is. Setsuna points out Tourne really should not travel by plumbing.
- Rai would call up Tourne in anger, pointing out that she froze the line by "having too much fun" and causing it to burst right open; spewing raw sewage in the investigation area.*
- Outside, Luna would help Artemis over to the dorm lobby. Charitee asks Galen about getting a map of the spill just to see how bad it is.
- Needless to say, the map itself is not very encouraging...Tourne would take the plumbing to the "nearest shower"
- The meeting between Artemis and the rest of the students would be pretty awkward - even leading to a funny comment by Galen about Artemis' condition.
- Tourne would return after Cloral appears again - and alas Tourne still smells like crap. She fakes going to another room.
- Rai would be a bit too late (at first) to deal with Tourne, but manages to arrive just in time as Amund informs her of their current situation (and needing to seize the assets at the Public Storage; not to mention the cash at the bank)
- Around this time, Tourne comes back as Rai tells her to GET OUT.
- With Artemis confused, Amund basically tl;drs the current story arc to her:
"The long and short of it is, our ex-Principal has gone mad and turned into a little girl, and is out to destroy us."

No Trespassing: Violators will have the crap beaten out of them. Survivors will have the crap beaten out of them again:
- Tourne manages to steal Claudine's and Lilith's shower, much to both of their disgusts as they have to put up with her smell.
- Claudine is weirded out that someone could be in the shower, until Rosette confirms it. With that, she picks up a metal rod and heads into the bathroom to force the foul smelling offender out.
- After Tourne is found in their shower. Claudine asks her how she got there. Tourne brings up its just for soap, which doesn't sit well with Claudine as she bashes the crap out of Tourne with said metal rod.
- Claudine lets Lilith know that she found the culprit, as the both of them chew her out over it. After Tourne points out she just went where the pipes took her, Lilith wonders how the hell Tourne got teaching credientials.
- Tourne lets her know (knowingly lying, see WTH?! below) that she got it for being the strongest boxer in the land.
- Rosette adds that Tourne did bust the sewer lines earlier, and the two gals should be grateful the school no longer uses the same lines as the city. This doesn't spare Tourne from Lilith and Claudine's wrath, however.
- Lilith asks Claudine if she can knock Tourne into the stratosphere, as Claudine points out she can pick out her outfit for today if she does. With that, Lilith yells out "FORE!" and knocks Tourne clear out of the bathroom! Claudine then calls Rai about the epic fail as Lilith adds that Tourne will be on the ground in about 2 seconds.
- Claudine puts on a bright floral printed yukata Lilith picks out. After the two briefly discuss their wishes to AVOID sewage, Claudine pulls out a fan, curiously waves it, then hides her face with it as the two head downstairs.

KNOCK OFF, KNOCK OFF, KNOCK OFF, KNOCK OFF:
- *SPLAT* And Tourne lands on the ground face first.
- Rai lets Claudine know that she plans to handle Tourne, and even has an idea to make her clean up her own mess. Amund brings up that they'd all be dead before Tourne cleans it up.
- Amund asks if Rai has been to Zanzibar, which she responds to with a Yes answer. Amund comments that with those volunteers, the mess could be gone by morning.
- At that point Comrade Kristophe (really Mayor Zucher) calls up Rai, informing her if she wants to esign the documents for three notices of Seizure (funnily enough, involving all three buildings the students plan to go to later)
- Rai allows them to be signed, giving the Investigation Club the clear they need to make their move. When Kristophe asks Amund if 50 volunteers are enough to clean up the streets, he replies that is plenty. He ends his transmission, by bringing up they will be there to clean up the streets shortly.
- Claudine and Lilith would head downstairs to get a grasp on the situation.
- Rai does not waste time and chews Rosette out for her attempted betrayal.
- Rosette loses all her privileges to toy with Claudine at this point.
- As Amund announces the groups, Claudine admits that she's enjoying the yukata too much and asks Lilith if she could buy more. Lilith tells her to go ahead and "knock herself out".
- Artemis is a bit shocked that Konata would get involved (for obvious reasons)
- Rai quickly points out that the bank will be more of a problem than the storage facility, due to the owner.
- Amund changes the assignments to reflect this. Violet would head down to join up with the group, who brings up that Yuuri is already out of the infirmary.
- Yuuri would return, but due to having Repunzel hair is not able to assist.
- Although students like Mina insist they could cut the hair, Yuuri just notes that it will grow right back.
- Yuuri brings up that they need to watch out for Urt Doush the 19th, as Tony told her about the guy.
- After the cleanup is finished (takes less than an hour according to Rai), the students warp to the city area.

WHILE ALL THIS IS GOING ON:
- Hannel shows her pissed off ness and assimilates another person, who unfortunately steals all her 5-Hour Energy and drinks it.
- The assimilated tween manages to escape eventually.

Leads Out of A Sad Source:
- Brie unfortunately gets stuck interrogating said tween for any leads. All the tween tells her is the First Chariots Bank owner wrecked all of some guy's cars. As the girl asks Brie about finding a guy*, she leaves before the tween finishes asking the question.

(Not Really) Important:
- Cloral's "It's also very stupid" pretty much sums up Tourne's crap in this session.
- It's hard to believe that after getting beaten down by Claudine and KNOCKED THE HELL OUT OF THE SHOWER by Lilith, that Tourne does not even have a scratch. What'd she do, eat pizza, drink milk, and hide a "BAKA" sign somewhere?

Shoutouts/Refs:
- The beginning of the game has references to the oh so infamous vid of Alex Trebek maybe getting drunk.
- Tourne, stop being Fluid Man. Nobody's really gonna watch that 1966 cartoon again around these parts.
- Why are the Chinatown Express Market, Bank of Chariots, and the Public Storage all shaped like triangles and all...goshdamn it do we really need another Triforce reference?
- "There is no God in this world" - Setsuna F. Seiei. Wait, you're telling me someone else used it?
- No wonder this session was crappy, Tourne made this session the butt of toilet jokes:
"...Someone threw your investigation in the crapper, Amund"
"What's next? Some other succubus shows up and point out I smell like crap too?"
"Kalain man...so we might have to wade through crap to fix the crap going on"
"Can we quit it with the crap?"
"...couldn't get any crappier =|"
"Just hire a Stinky Diver"
Rai: Tourne, you're in deep crap now
Charitee: ...she's already crap. No use saying she's in deep crap when she herself smells like it
Tammy: This feels like a bad 70s game show with Alex Trebek. At this rate, I'm going to telephone Hitler (A reference to a Double Dare question about the Toilet)
"Things are crappy for them too. No way they can go see what's in the storage facilities if the entrance is crap. I nominate someone with super snazzy nose plugs!"
Cloral: It's also very stupid
Charitee: Crappy and stupid
Konata: Enough already with that, please
-- Clearly Konata was not amused and probably won't spare the GM next time for the next round of crap jokes
- "We could call Mr. Fix-It to heal you up"
- Mina's thoughts: "I didn't know my dead cat came back as a succubus"
- "GET OUT"
- New and Improved Kyle Busch? Rosette, you're just like the old Kyle Busch: A moron >O
- "I don't know whether she should be renamed Regene or Wang Liu Mei"
- So the Bank owner tore up all of Finch's racecars? What?

WTH?!:
- HOW THE HELL WAS TOURNE ABLE TO TALK IN THE SCHOOL'S PLUMBING?
-- See shoutout. Her Liquification ability's loosely based off that...considering the GM actually saw that show.
- How the hell did Tourne break that sewage line?
-- She froze it. I kid you not - evidence of that will be shown next session.
- LUNA AND ARTEMIS? WHAT'S NEXT, CATS NAMED USAGI AND MINAKO?
-- I believe Mina would like to have a word with you on that. Too bad Brie might have the idea for next session
- Dude, we never knew there was a metal pole in Claudine's and Lilith's room. Where'd that come from?
-- Unexplained, maybe one of them bought it. Maybe someone used hammerspace. Maybe the realism barrier failed. This is a good question that the GM will now proceed to NOT ANSWER. *runs*
--- Leo made a good point: Maybe it's the shower curtain pole; or quite possibly a broomstick with no head; those can be made of metal.
- Lilith made a good point: How the hell did Tourne get her teaching credientials?
-- Answer: McDaniels faked them for her. In fact, this is a big big problem at Poikkitie Academy; where you got upwards of 40% of teachers teaching without the credentials! Of course Al's trying to fix that problem, but...
- What idiot villain would keep 5-Hour Energy around?
-- ...I haven't the damnest clue there.